Travel Home

Intention to be at home – at the source of my being, wherever I am… So as I travel, I may always travel home.

Saturday, January 6, 2007

The Privilege to Read

11/12/06 in Nepal

This morning at 3 am I was startled and woken up by loud sounds of honking horns – an incessant string of sharp melodies from Indian-style buses signaled the first ones leaving Basantapur for lower towns. The sounds came intermittently for about an hour and a half in the early morning. Rather than fighting them as noise, I decided to accept them – without judgment and without annoyance. This decision to me represented my arrival to this familiar end-of-the-road town, and my intention to be at home here. Knowing that all the neighbors and my host family along with 28 boarders were all fast asleep, there was a comfort in their peace for me. Their relative comfort in the only ways they knew, which I may have perceived as bad hygiene, noise, dust, pollution, an the overall backward quality of this hillside town felt to me like something of which I no longer held on so tightly. Even though I still needed to boil water and watch out for what I eat, I am also content. Letting go of fear in discomfort, which only exists in my mind, is freeing.

So I took the opportunity this early morning to finish Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress, a novel set in the mountains of Sechuan during the Cultural Revolution. The two main characters were city youths who were sent to this remote village for re-education. Talented and intellectually hungry, they became master storytellers in their desperate situation. The novel was a quick read with romance, history and a nice dose of country Chinese culture during the time of Chairman Mao. At that time, books other than Mao or communist writing were totally banned; however, these two young men’s lives in re-education completely changed when they got a hold of a suitcase full of translated western novels. Devouring the books, their minds opened to ideas of romance, freedom, and hope. A memorable passage described their overwhelming and dizzying reaction upon opening the suitcase – how extremely thrilling and wonderous it was for them to see these unavailable and unfamiliar books!

When I read this passage two nights ago, I was staying in Hile, the town 4 hours below Bansantapur, at Bhim Sir’s brother’s home. His children along with their cousins and friends (age 2,3,7,10…) were absolutely adorable. After dinner, in my dimly lit room surrounded by children, I took out the bag that contained the children’s books donated by Nat’s mother Franny. Upon taking out one shiny colorful book, their eyes lit up, and what followed for some time was joyous exploration and total chaos in and around the bag of books. Little hands reached for the books and bright eyes widened at the turning of each page. Their reaction was overwhelming, and because I was surprised (yet now in reflection: what did I expect?!), my breath was taken away, my throat tightened, and my eyes watered. Eventually after some coaxing, the room calmed down. Each child seemed to have settled on his or her favorite book. While I read some of the stories to them, deep within I was left speechless by the sight of these shiny colorful books in the dimly lit room, surrounded by adorable Nepalese children. In the end, even though I didn’t give them the books like they so desired, I let the oldest sister pick one out to keep so she can eventually share it with the younger ones. She picked the Adventures of Winnie the Pooh…

Later in the evening while reading in bed, I came upon the suitcase/book scene in Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress. The parallel between this scene and my experience that night dawned on me. The city youths trapped in the mountains of Sechuan receiving brutal re-education, and the lovely Nepalese children trapped here in poverty – both lacked fresh ideas and books, both in need. Mao’s brutality in the Cultural Revolution, and the incompetence of the Nepalese monarchy coupled with the Maoist insurgency brought people to the same place…

Sharing this connection with Joseph, Bhim Sir’s son who accompanied me from Kathmandu, I learned that in the past two years, especially during the height of the dangerous conflicts between Maoist and government forces, books of both Marxist/Leninist ideas or anything containing a king or a queen became objects by which both sides (the Royal Nepalese Army and the Maoists) extended brutality and accusation. In fear of taking either side, people in Basantapur burned books on the streets and hid the royal family pictures. This information, along with seeing the war-damaged police post from recent battles brought me chills and a sense of compassion and relief for Nepal’s fragile yet promising peace.

Friday, January 5, 2007

Yoga and Subtraction

Spring 06 Article for Space


For two days in a row, I saw the same green eighteen-wheeler truck on my way to school on the Mass Turnpike – what a coincidence! It was a milk truck with an advertisement on its sides. The interesting message got me thinking; it said, “The key to life is what you add to it. Add something.” Presumably it served to remind consumers to add the company’s full line of milk products to their shopping lists. The key to life is what you add to it – what a modern western concept that is not too uncommon, right? However, as I thought more about it, the message didn’t quite agree with me. Personally, as I reflected my yoga practice, I realized that the key to my life might just be what I can let go or subtract from it.

When we first start practicing yoga, like any new hobby, it can feel like an addition game – new mat, new outfits, new environment, new routine and friends. Yoga certainly added a lot to my life and opened up new possibilities. However, as I continued to practice at a deeper level, yoga began to help me shed away some unnecessary habits and thought patterns such as fear and anxiety. Habits like smoking and drinking alcohol had less and less of a grip on my life. On the mat, as I discovered and touched the core power of my heart over and over, my life began to simplify. It is true for me personally that yoga had lessened my obsession with the material world as well.

What is this subtraction game that comes so naturally as a part of our practice? In the ancient Yoga Sutras of Patanjali, this idea is categorized as a Aparigraha, the restraint of nonhoarding, and Santosha, the observance of contentment. In our modern life, these two concepts can still be applied. We have the opportunity to practice non-hoarding when we are in the mall – do I really need another pair of jeans? We can also observe what we think makes us happy – am I ever really happier because of the accumulation of material things? When we reach deep into our hearts, we realize that the answers to those questions are no. We can also extends into the nonmaterial world as well, by saying no to and letting go of negative thought patterns of fear, anxiety, anger, and envy just to name a few.

The practice of yoga doesn’t necessarily mean we have to relinquish or renounce everything. However, we need to consciously examine our relationship with things or thoughts, as well as practice clearing space and cleaning house for something better both inside and out.

Our modern world does not encourage the practices of nonhoarding and contentment. But we must not forget the real answers lies within ourselves, and our yoga practice serves to align us with the truth. Ghandi once said, “The essence of civilization consists not in the multiplication of wants but in their deliberate and voluntary renunciation.” This is a hard thing to do, but it certainly rings true.

So next time when we are busy seeking new teachers, workshops, clothing, etc in our modern yogic lives, pause for a moment and consider the deeper work of subtraction. Connect with the teachings of Aparigraha and Santosha. You may be pleasantly surprised that in this modern world driven by consumerism, there are ways to simplify and return to a quieter, more aligned and conscious way of living, especially through our yoga practice on and off the mat.